This poem is taken from my 2019 book entitled Leftovers & New Concoctions. Essentially it is the story of my life as told in poetic verse. It is rather long, over 1000 words but then it had to span fifty-one years of my life. Except for a few corrections here and there it is as it appeared in the book (see landing page to purchase).
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Me Story
I was born many years ago
at a very young age
When unwed mothers
Seemed to be all the rage.
Through circumstances beyond my control
I was kidnapped three times as a babe
Though I was too young for me to recall
As parents they all missed the grade
Love was absent
My first dad I never got to know
My second was too drunk to care
Emotionally tossed like the waves to and fro
Walk that mile if you dare
At sixteen I was tossed to the world
To try and make it on my own
Like trash to the dump I was hurled
With no place I could call my home
Love was absent
Drugs and drinking were all that I knew
That was my life for many a year
I got busted ratted out by my crew
But please don’t shed a tear
Through my friends the police found me
But it was still me that did the crime
I can’t fault them can’t you see
It was my doing the whole time
Love was absent
It was time to get out, time to move on
I had a new life to start to live
Like a new chapter or verse in a song
I had so much of me to give
I thumbed a ride and headed west
To live a life out on the coast
I made it there in four days with no rest
I am in no way trying to boast
Love was absent
I was alone to fend for myself
In a city I knew very little of
It wasn’t so bad in itself
I fit in like a hand to a glove
Soon I found myself seeking food and shelter
Hitting the soup lines just to stay alive
Surviving on handouts and welfare
There had to be a better way to thrive.
Love was absent
It was time for me to make a change
I felt this deep within my heart
Life was becoming very strange
Inside I was falling apart
So I entered myself into a program
That promised to make me a better man
But it felt more like a reprogram
I had to come up with a new plan
Love was absent
Back and forth across the land I did travel
Unsettled to say the least
On roads of asphalt some of gravel
All the way from west to east
Never quite being able to settle
And always feeling out of place
Always the loner always the rebel
Love was absent
I was in search of something
Never knowing just what it was
It could have been anything
And in fact sometimes it was.
I was empty on the inside
Trying to fill it with junk
All along feeling horrified
Life during this time stunk
Love was absent
Once more out west I went
Stopping to dry out once again
Though it was time well spent
I set out on the road once again
Winter and living out on the streets
Living life being known as the bear
Making friends with all I would meet
Giving anything if I had it to spare
Love was absent
Then one day everything changed
Life for me was turned upside down
Priorities would soon be rearranged
I would give up for all I was renown
But it wouldn’t be about me anymore
I had a higher calling now
He knocked and I opened the door
I knew it was going to be better somehow
Love was now present
I went to a school of higher learning
To learn of love and peace and God
I knew inside I had a deeper yearning
But never once did I feel it odd.
But as it usually does trouble came my way
And I was out in the world once more
Then something happened which affects me to this day
It rocked me to my very core
Love was no more
In the world and out of place
Living for myself once again
I was falling flat on my face
But as it is said no pain no gain
Drugs had taken over everything
That had meant so much to me before
I was willing to try just about anything
Just so my life I could restore
Love was not real
In an attempt to reclaim my life
I quit everything that I was doing
I had even asked you to be my wife
We never did see the trouble that was brewing
We had a falling out, a dreadful collapse
And apart we tried to move on
We should have left well alone perhaps
But our love was too strong
Love was a feeling
She was taken away by a single shot
So long ago on Valentine’s Day
Things may have been different, maybe not
I’m sure that no one can really say
That year was the hardest I have ever known
Too many losses for one man to bear
Soon greener grasses would soon be sown
And love sprang up in the air
Love was in bloom
From her I received the greatest gift
That a man could ever get
But soon thereafter we began to drift
Something that I would sooner forget
Life for me kept moving forward
I couldn’t afford to let it stop
Everything was planned and neatly ordered
Then love hit me again like a karate chop
Love redefined
I was at my weakest I could say now
Having new freedom gained
And in a moment there somehow
You became so deeply ingrained
Together we went on and tied the knot
And then had a child of our own
Life would be better or so we thought
If only we could have known
Love had failed me
A new life a new town with little change
Problems of old not being solved
Something in my life had to be rearranged
With God I had to be more involved
I fell sick and came near to death
Later losing most of my vision
And still today I cannot grasp the depth
Of His love and His provision
Love perfected
Fast forward to the present
Once more I serve my lord
Life for me once more is pleasant
For I live it by His word
This is my story of how I came to be
The man before you that you now see
I owe my all the God who sits in heaven
This is what I believe this is my profession
02-12-15
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